23rd Muharram 1448H |
Assalamu'alaikum, |
Have you ever asked yourself this question: Why am I not getting the results I'm looking for, even though I'm doing everything right? |
I'm trying to memorize the Qur'an, but I keep failing… even though I dedicate time daily, hired a teacher, and made memorization my no. 1 priority. I'm trying to build a business. I took all the means, I even give charity often, but I'm barely surviving. I'm trying to be a good parent/spouse. I take parenting/marriage classes, I work on my temper, but I still snap at my failure and feel like a failure. I do all the 'Barakah' stuff: pray on time, read Qur'an, do my adhkar, honor my parents, avoid sins (and when I slip, I ask Allah to forgive me), make dua constantly... But SubhanAllah, nothing is happening. No major breakthrough or meaningful results.
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It’s tough to be in this spot.. especially when you watch others who seem to put in less effort (and don't care for the 'Barakah stuff' at all) achieve so much more than you. But here are three perspectives that perhaps might help: |
1. There's Barakah in the withholding |
Allah says in the Qur'an: |
وَعَسَىٰ أَن تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَّكُمْ ۖ وَعَسَىٰ أَن تُحِبُّوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَّكُمْ ۗ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ "...But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah knows, while you know not." (Al-Baqarah, 2:216) |
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Take the three scenarios I mentioned above, and imagine the opposite happened: |
If Allah opened the door of memorization and you memorized instantly by glancing at a page; would you have spent all those hours with the Qur'an, earned the reward of every repetition, or become a means of sustenance for a Qur'an teacher halfway across the world for many months? If your business exploded beyond expectations — would you be able to handle the growing pains or scaling at such speeds? Would you sleep calmly at night, or lie awake stressing about your business? Would you still give charity sincerely, or give it for 'tax-advantageous reasons' as per your newly hired CFO? If your kids were 'picture perfect' — well-behaved, never raising their voices or arguing with each other, eating and sleeping on time — would parenting be meaningful without its daily challenges and beautiful moments?
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Ibn Ata'illah in his famous Hikam said: "Sometimes He gives while depriving you, and sometimes He deprives you in giving. When He opens up your understanding of deprivation (al-man'), the deprivation becomes the same as the gift (al-ataa').” |
If we could see the Barakah hidden inside what Allah withheld from us, we would thank Him for every closed door. The challenge for us is to thank Him even though we don't see the Barakah in His withholding. |
2. The withholding is an invitation to dig deeper |
When things don't go your way, it's an invitation to look inward as you're being purified through your patience. |
Dig deeper spiritually: If the companions did not struggle at the Battle of Uhud, would they have learned the gravity of disobeying the Prophet's ﷺ commands? Similarly, reflect spiritually on your life: Perhaps there's a sin blocking the results you're aiming for... or your days feel chaotic because you've been neglecting your Salah and forgotten the Qur'an. Perhaps you need to work on mending your relationship with your parents or a relative…scrutinize yourself spiritually, and if you can’t think of anything, ask Allah for forgiveness anyway, because seeking forgiveness is a means for doors to open for sure. |
Dig deeper practically: Is there something in the way you're trying to achieve your results that needs improvement? If your method of memorizing the Quran is not working, have you tried another method? If your business is failing, have you tried to improve your product, asked customers, or pivoted to a new venture? Use the fact that you're not getting results as a driver to dig deeper and improve yourself, not as an excuse for despair. |
3. The withholding turns your heart towards Allah and the Akhira |
If Allah gave us everything we wished for, whenever we wished for it — would we long for the Akhira and work for it? Or would we settle comfortably into this dunya and neglect what comes after? |
How many times because of difficulties and delays in our lives did we get up for tahajjud, read more Qur'an, or made more dua? |
I know it sounds cliche, but we really need to internalize that this world is not the be-all and end-all. And we'll never find true Jannah on this earth. |
Does that mean we don't strive or do our best? No, it means we set sincere intentions and work hard but detach ourselves from the results. Remember that the One who withholds is the same One who will not hold you accountable for the results in your life (since results are in His hands). But He will hold you accountable for your intentions and your effort. |
May Allah grant us this understanding, make us sincere to Him, and fill our withholdings with hidden Barakah. Ameen. |
What's one thing Allah withheld or delayed from you in the past that you're now grateful He did? Hit reply and let me know. I read every response. |
Sincerely, |
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